I left a children’s home – and was embraced by love

I left a children s home – At 18, Poppie now feels like part of a family after navigating the complexities of life in care. Her journey began at 10, when a strained relationship with her mother led to her placement in a foster home. Within two years, she transitioned to a children’s home in Hertfordshire, where she stayed until just before turning 18. The absence of her birth family hasn’t diminished her sense of belonging, thanks to the support she received from a local care worker and her son, Reuben, who became a vital figure in her transition to adulthood.

A lifeline during the transition to independence

Brigitte Marshall, 58, and her son Reuben, 24, were not just support staff; they became anchors in Poppie’s life. Their role extended beyond basic assistance—they actively guided her through critical life stages. When Poppie needed help with her GCSEs, Reuben stepped in, ensuring she had the resources and encouragement to succeed. Today, they accompany her to medical appointments and assist in planning her future, including her upcoming college course in health and care. Poppie’s aspirations to become a doctor are now more than a distant dream, thanks to their unwavering support.

“It means so much having Brigitte and her family in my life,” Poppie shares. “They’ve become like family to me, and I even call Brigitte ‘mummy Brigitte’.”

The Marshall family’s bond with Poppie is a direct result of the Finding Family programme, a government initiative that pairs young people in care with local coordinators. These coordinators, funded by the local council, work closely with children to nurture relationships with trusted adults, whether they’re family members, teachers, or even individuals they met while in care. For Poppie, this meant connecting with Brigitte and Reuben, who had previously been her care workers, and building a sense of security that many others in similar situations lack.

From loneliness to connection

While Poppie’s story is one of hope, not everyone leaving care experiences such a smooth transition. Many face what is often termed the “cliff edge”—a sudden drop in support after exiting the system. Brigitte recalls the emotional weight of this moment: “The thought of her leaving and being all on her own when she left care was shocking.”

Even with help in securing housing, managing finances, and enrolling in education, the emotional and social safety nets often fall short. Brigitte emphasizes that beyond practical assistance, her family aimed to provide Poppie with a sense of value and love. “I just wanted her to feel valued, loved, and supported,” she says. This emotional investment is what distinguishes the Marshall family’s impact on Poppie’s life.

Brigitte, who already has four children, sees Poppie as an extension of her own family. Their connection has grown stronger through shared experiences, including family BBQs, social outings, and even trips to the movies. Poppie’s close relationship with the Marshall family highlights the transformative power of these support networks, which can be a lifeline for young people navigating uncharted territory.

Expanding the program for more young people

Mackenzie, 20, is another beneficiary of the Finding Family programme. After his mother’s death and the breakdown of his relationship with his father, he spent six years in care, often separated from his Hertfordshire-based family. His care home in Norfolk was far from home, but his coordinator worked tirelessly to bridge that gap. By facilitating connections with extended family members, including aunts, uncles, cousins, and a half-sister, Mackenzie was able to rebuild ties that had been strained by years of instability.

“It’s wonderful to feel close to them again,” Mackenzie reflects. “I still have trauma from my childhood, and sometimes need time out, but without this contact, my life would feel incomplete.”

His coordinator also played a role in creating a “safe space” for him to engage with his family, organizing reunions that allowed him to reconnect with those he hadn’t seen in years. These efforts underscore the programme’s goal: to help young people reestablish meaningful relationships that can provide lifelong emotional and social support.

The government aims to scale this initiative to benefit all 80,000 children in care across the UK. As part of a broader reform plan, the Department for Education has allocated £8.4 million in funding over the next three years to ensure every child leaving care receives similar support. This includes hiring coordinators to help build bonds with trusted adults, whether they are family members, educators, or community figures.

A step toward stability and lifelong connections

Currently, the Finding Family programme is active in 25 local areas, with initial results showing its effectiveness. Participants in the pilot reported an average of nearly two meaningful relationships formed, and more than a third reconnected with family members. These outcomes highlight the program’s potential to address the emotional void many young people face when exiting care.

Yet, the journey is not without hurdles. Critics argue that while the programme is a positive step, it is just one piece of a larger puzzle. The government’s reforms also include expanding foster placements, keeping children closer to their home communities, and extending support from councils to age 25. These measures aim to create a more holistic approach to care, ensuring that young people have a foundation for stability and growth.

Children’s minister Josh MacAlister acknowledges the importance of these efforts. “Too many children leave care without the lifelong relationships that most of us rely on for love, support, and stability throughout adulthood,” he explains. The new funding is part of a comprehensive strategy to modernize children’s social care and reduce the challenges associated with transitioning out of the system.

The road ahead: Challenges and opportunities

Despite the program’s successes, its implementation remains uneven. While some councils and charities have independently developed similar support systems, these initiatives are often patchy, lacking the consistency and resources needed for widespread impact. The government’s plan to standardize access to coordinators aims to rectify this, ensuring that every child in care receives tailored support to build connections that can last a lifetime.

For Poppie and Mackenzie, the programme has been a turning point. It has not only helped them navigate the challenges of adulthood but also reignited their sense of belonging. Their stories are a testament to the power of human connection and the importance of sustained support during times of transition. As the Finding Family programme expands, it offers a glimmer of hope for others who may have felt isolated during their time in care.

Yet, the road to full implementation is long. Young people leaving care face significant risks: three times more likely to be without education, employment, or training, and a third end up homeless within a year of exiting the system. The programme’s success in fostering relationships is a critical step toward addressing these challenges, but broader systemic changes are still needed. Brigitte’s vision of a future where every child leaving care has a support system to rely on is a goal worth striving for.

As Poppie prepares to begin her college course, she carries with her the lessons of resilience and the comfort of a family that believed in her. Her story, along with Mackenzie’s, illustrates the potential of the Finding Family programme to transform lives. With continued investment and commitment, this initiative may become a cornerstone of care reform, ensuring that no young person has to face the world alone.